THINGS I WOULD DO IF I HAD SUPERHUMAN POWERS

Or, What would I do if I was the "Wily Wonder Wench"?

There’s lots of stuff I’d do if I was the only Wily Wonder Wench in the whole wide world. 

Here are just a few of the things that would keep me busy (instead of my usual habit of waiting for Godot to arrive).

1.  Walk on water (I've always wanted to do that; besides, the burning bush and loaf of bread miracles have already been claimed by other wee folk).

2.  Talk to animals and plants (frankly, I’m all for inter-species communication to reduce the hot air levels in the universe and increase the joy of hanging out together).

3.  Turn testy folk into toads (this is bound to strike terror into the hearts of the serenity-challenged but guarantee the rest of us nothing but uninterrupted bliss).

4.  Own the world’s only flying-carpet franchise (this is a truly untapped, sure-fire, win-win business opportunity).

5.  Trounce the One-Eyed, One Horned Flying Purple People Eater (the one responsible for organizing fruitless wars to settle accounts and leaving behind nothing but a frightful mess).

6.  Organize Dream Teams of Fairy Godmothers with magic wands to turn everyone’s longings into reality (that way everyone can be Cinderella and Prince Charming for a change).

7.  Hire my Sagittarian friend Cupid (to bring lots more love into the world).

8.  Immortalize Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny (so they can keep up with the growing demand for their intangible heart-warming services).

9.  Fly to the moon and play among the stars (this will satisfy my insatiable curiosity about time travel excursions and meeting other inter-galactic folk).

10. Befriend the Goddess of Glitch (that way I can head off unwelcome surprises at the pass, before all hell breaks loose).

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Note.  If you want to practice your superhuman powers on earth...fire up your imagination and blast off...and before I forget..."May the Force be with you...Twinkle Toes!".